Wednesday, May 2, 2012

What is marriage???

I think many people have different ideas about it, but I believe marriage is.............
A love story!

Today I would like to tell you a story.
Yes a story, a love story. In particular our love story!
So her goes~

Once upon a time there was a young girl who fell in love with her Prince Charming.  Prince Charming was all she had wanted in her future husband and he adored everything about her and could not imagine life without her.
Together they decided that they belonged together and were married. After they were married they lived  happily ever after.

What? That's it? That is what you wanted to share? Well that is so uninspiring! And quite frankly not even believable. In fact rewind that and start again because that is not how real life is!

Well, that is how I see my life, all except the ending part yet.
In fact the happily ever after part is TRUE and it will continue to be true until the end of time because marriage is not just a wedding ceremony - it is a life-long journey that is filled with adventure all the way.

Oh our adventure has had many ups and downs and sometimes the downs seem to be all too frequent and drawn out. But when you commit to a lifetime of adventure together you truly have something and somebody to share that with.

I indeed have been blessed in this adventure as we have now been married for 25 years today.

Who could have guessed that when I was given a letter by the girl next door after school one day that I would marry the boy who sent that letter to me. I was only 12 years old at the time and I was being asked to attend youth group at our church on Friday by this young boy, because he liked me.

I did go on Friday night and for many Friday nights after. We developed a friendship which I know his friends teased him about ( he was three years older than me) that was probably a little too early for both of us,  for some reason for a few years in my life we were no longer close friends.

Then as I neared my 15th year ( I can't remember when exactly ) my beloved became a very important part of my life again. I remember him especially as the most important part of my 16th birthday celebration as we went out to dinner with my family. He was the person I wanted to have as my  most particular guest.

To try to keep the story reasonable short we were engaged after I turned 18 and had a two year engagement. Stephen was at University and I was at college we were over 600km (which is an 8 hour journey) away from each other for two years and married just before I turned 21, to live HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

How I think back to those days and see how much in love we were. Oh no, I am not saying that we are not in love now but I am reflecting on the ability of that love to last through the changes of these years together.

We now have 12 beautiful children and have had many challenges both person and financial during this time and what I know is this - that what is stable, what is true and unchanging is the fact that our marriage is FOREVER.

We know that even on the most difficult of days that we have each other  to rely on, to support one another and even have disagreements with. For yes, even in the best of marriages I don't think you can  agree 100% of the time. What is important and real is the ability to overcome these periods of disagreement and  be united in the truth of the 'foreverness' of our love.

Our children will tell you that both of us are very strong willed, passionate people ( Autumn here: we kids  say  very stubborn.)who stand up for what we believe in. This unfortunately can lead to some less than pleasant 'discussion' and not always privately.

Do I regret this? Absolutely!
Can we learn from this? Absolutely!
Is it good for the children? Yes and no!

I do think that it is best if children do not see their parents have a little 'discussion' but I also think that it show them we are not perfect, that we are still sinners and we need to be humble and sorry for past mistakes and try to do better with each opportunity that comes our way. We have faults and troubles we need to deal with, BUT with all of  this our love is strong and faithful.

We are faithful! We are faithful to the idea of love, marriage and happy ever afters. After all marriage is sacrament, and God is our binding link. We are  three fold link that has God as our centre.
Marriage is not for only when it feels good. It is for the not so good times as well. It is for all the journey and how wonderful to be able to look back with the one you started the journey with and say " Remember when........."

Sadly today in society our children are not shown this 'forever' theme in those around them. Too many children have come from homes that 'once the fun has gone so are we' and this has to influence their own outlook on what marriage is.
For us as Christians we need to be an example of a 'good marriage' not necessarily a constantly 'happy marriage' because marriage is more than the feeling of love and happiness is about forever- no matter what.

One thing that I know has changed in our marriage is me, in fact both of us. We are not the same two young people we were when we first were married, and this is a good thing.

We both have grown and matured. We have become concrete in our commitment to God, our Faith, each other and our children.

Who would have known that we would achieve so much with our lives, and hey it isn't even over yet?
Who would know? God DID!

Thank you to my Price Charming who loves me unconditionally, with all my faults and problems. You are my knight protector, my Romeo, the father of our precious children and not last by any means the man I want to spend all the rest of my days with.

Happy Anniversary my love ♥ ♥

I think this says it all.........
Blessings to you and your homes,


allisamazing said...

What a wonderful love story. Happy Anniversary!

Anonymous said...

What a precious love story you shared with us today. Happy Anniversary to you Dear Gae, and may you have many, many, more! :)

Vicky said...

Beautiful post! Happy anniversary, Gae and Stephen:-)

Nadja said...

Happy anniversary! What a lovely story. Our 25th is coming up in July...

Erin said...

Oh Gae
Happy Anniversary to you and Stephen my friends{{{}}}
Well the beginning of your story had goosebumps running down my arms:)
and then your middle part, well I knew parts of that but not all, how interesting.
A little 'discussion' in front of the children can be healthy, to see how we resolve these situations.
Very true, we are not the same people who married, but, one hopes better.

Autumn said...

Happy anniversary Mum and Dad!
Your both so darn awesome!

Trish said...

What a beautiful post full of heart and grace!
Dearest Gae, may your anniversary be the sweetest yet..and may the Lord grant you both many more to come!
Love and blessings to you..Trish xx

Judy Dudich said...

I love how Autumn chimed in there!

One thing that I think has led to the "marriage doesn't have to be forever" least, in my "dating". The whole mindset in dating is that you are "trying out" a mate...if it works, great, if not, then hit "discard" and try a new one. This is why my husband and I have changed the tides of "norm" and have not permitted our teens to date. I can see this reflected in your post...for, although you had met Stephen at a very young seems as though God put a natural "timing" into effect and it wasn't until you were older that the two of you were wed in matrimony. That is SO beautiful!

The legacy you have built for your 12 WONDERFUL children; and the grand-children you will have, one a testament to your faith, trust, and LOVE.

This is a beautiful story and it filled my heart with JOY to read it. Thank you for sharing with us.


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